Trust

Ladies and gentlemen, do you know what is trust? Do you know in which context do I mean by trust? According to the Longman Active Study English-Chinese Dictionary, trust means firm belief in the honesty or worth of someone or something; faith. In other words, trust means believing in somebody due to the worth of their words, actions or deeds.

Trust, like loyalty, is a very important asset to all of us. To be able to trust in one another is actually a privilege for all of us. It proves that the other person whom you trust is trustworthy. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have put your trust in that individual at all!

But I’m sure that you don’t simply put your trust in anybody. Normally, you would put trust in your friends and family; you might put a bit of trust in strangers, albeit a very minute amount of it.

Still, let us narrow down our trust to the context of friends. These are the people who were once strangers to you but have got to know each other better. These are the people whom you trusted less initially but gradually you put in more trust as you get to know the other person better and believe that he or she is trustworthy.

To me, trust is everything. Trust is the most important element in whatever we do, especially in tasks that we must do together as a group. Don’t take it as if I am boasting about myself, but honestly I am a very loyal friend. During my friends’ hard times I don’t like to desert them; I feel guilty. I try to be there for my friends when they need me. In the end, I put in my trust on them also.

The most discouraging and disappointing thing is when your friends start to abuse your loyalty and trust. Because I am loyal, I am also very generous and gracious to forgive. But if my loyalty and trust were to be trifled with, that I cannot forgive; it is even harder to forget.

Could you imagine how does it feel like to have your loyalty and trust be abused? You would definitely feel betrayed. You would go like, “How could you treat me like this, after all the amount of trust I’ve put into you?” But believe it or not, there are bound to be people who are like Judas Iscariot, and perhaps even worse.

I have a friend who I hold with high regards. I have always trusted him and he is one of my closest buddies. I see potential in him to be a high achiever, a person who can excel better than I do. I have envied his character and the potential that he possesses, but no matter how perfect he seems to other people, he lacks the maturity when it comes to dealing with problems and relationships. It is due to such lack of maturity that built up his apathetic attitude, and his failure to understand the enormity of his actions and how offended people can be.

As a result of his apathy, his promises are just words in the air; they hold no water. Initially I could trust him on certain things, but this time, I find it difficult to trust him anymore.

There were moments when he was called to complete a certain section of an assignment. He promised that he would do it, but later on got a call from the head of the assignment saying that the latter would do it for him. Why would that be necessary, unless the head knew that he couldn’t trust the former to complete it? And why wouldn’t the former be able to complete it? That was because he was too absorbed in doing the thing he liked to do best that he could just completely forget what he should actually be doing. And because he loves doing what he liked to do, he would even shun away friends that have been loyal to him for the very “thing” that would “betray” him in the end.

Sad as it may seem, I pity whoever who loses my trust. It is easy to gain my trust, frankly speaking. And to lose my trust, one has to go on offending me repeatedly. I am more than willing to give second chances, but my patience is limited, too. Friends who trifle with my loyalty and trust are no friends. Harsh as this may sound, I will not hesitate to severe ties with any friend who betrays my trust and loyalty, for they are not worthy for me to call as friends. They are hypocrites!

If there comes to a point when I require to talk to someone to “iron things out”, it would most probably mean that we have an issue of trust and loyalty to settle. It has not yet come to the point where I would severe my ties with that person, but I am not far from doing so either. It is as if I am giving the other person the last opportunity to sort things out. Don’t ask me to think about the other person’s feelings, for if I come to this stage, it would mean that I have been considering the other person’s feelings long enough. It is high time that he or she thinks about my feelings.

I am governed by the logical mind. I don’t let emotions overpower me. Instead, I tell my emotions to feel how I want to feel. But of course, there are moments when you would let your emotions rule you for a while. But even so, I believe there are friends whom you could talk to to ease your emotional distress, if any.

Trust is worthless. You can’t buy trust with money, you earn it. The same goes for respect and loyalty. You gain my trust, my loyalty and respect because you deserve it, therefore you earn it. But the moment I sense treason, I’ll revoke them, of course with a warning beforehand.

If you think that friends are just a phase in life, then you don’t deserve my trust. If you think that friends are merely shoulders for you to cry on when you have problems, only to leave them in the dark when they cry out for you, then you don’t deserve my loyalty. If you think you can leave your friends who have been always loyal to you for something that you like but less important when your friends needed you the most, then you don’t deserve my respect. If you think my heart is too soft to invoke the hardest and most provoking of actions, you are wrong. My heart is hard enough to kill off every friendship that I deem unworthy very much mercilessly without any warning. But I am not that heartless; I’ll still offer second chances.

If you think that I am ever ready to forgive even though you offend me repeatedly, yes, that is true, but the more you offend me the harder I find to forgive you. If you try to play with my goodwill, I shall not hesitate to give you my coldest treatment. It is only natural that I retaliate any offences, but I can do so in the most refining manner. Don’t try to be sarcastic with me; I was known as the king of sarcasm back in school.

I’m warning those who dare to play with my trust and loyalty. You’ll be paid back one hundred times worse the treatment you gave me. And I needn’t do the job at all. Someone else will.

I’m not threatening you. I merely want you to know and realise how important not to play with other people’s trust and loyalty. And if you dare betray anybody’s trust, I’ll make sure that you suffer for that betrayal. I believe in discipline, and that person who betrays will indeed be disciplined.